Simple Song.

I have no idea how to start this, so I am just going to go for it.

Hi. My name is Julianne. And I have a shit ton on my mind. I started this blog so that I could thrust my feelings into cyberspace. 

Now that that is over (I hate the way that looks by the way) I want to get into the real stuff.

Sometimes when I look at the Empire State Building outside my window at night, I wonder exactly how I got here. It is exhilarating, beautiful, and so utterly mind-blowing in its way of getting my head out of the clouds and my feet back on the ground. A major monument has its way of making you realize how small you really are. That is what is so amazing about this place. It is the most complicated relationship I have ever had in my life, so time-consuming and emotion-filled that I can barely grasp exactly how it makes me feel. After being here for about three months, I am starting to just figure it out. What living here has done for me so far is that I have finally truly experienced being humbled. Small towns can make you feel like you are about thirty stories tall, and that the world is exactly how and what you experience there. Back then, even though I wouldn't have said it out loud, I thought I knew it all. I had experienced every facet of good and bad in my short eighteen years, and no one could tell me otherwise. I knew love, loss, hate, despair, happiness, success, complication. All of it. But no one could have told me that this is how life really is. Doing everything for myself. Feeling everything for myself. Seeing so many different stages and places every single day shows me exactly that I am just another person. I have absolutely nothing figured out. When I try and sleep at night I can barely get my heart to stop racing because I feel as if I am battling who I am and what I will become. But slowly, I am coming to grips that who I am right now is fine. Insecure? Absolutely. Flawed? No doubt. Selfish. Of course. What do all of these things do? They make me realize that I am also talented, successful, and so blessed for everything I have been given so far. The people I have met, the things that I have seen, and most importantly, the place I am beginning to have in this city. Even when I feel like I have no place left to go, I can always look outside my window at that insanely famous skyscraper and know-everything is essentially limitless, and I have so much more to go. That's all for now.